High on Aspiration, Low on Ability...Part 5

The prequels!

High on Aspiration, Low on Ability

High on Aspiration, Low on Ability....Part 2

High on Aspiration, Low on Ability....Part 3

High on Aspiration, Low on Ability....Part 4

Since I started running in January,  I've crossed a few things off of my bucket list.  I've never run a whole mile in my entire life, so all of this is really....something.  I was always one of the kids strolling around the field, getting a 20 minute mile for my Phys. Ed. test.  Now my record is 6.5 miles in one run.  I ran from my house to my parent's house, and I called my mom before I left. "Hey, if I run to your house, will you give me a lift home?  I sure as hell ain't running back."  "Oh, well I'm not home from the grocery store yet..." "Ma, I'm running there, not driving....you got a while." (1 hour and 26 minutes to be exact.  She made it home in PLENTY of time.)

I made an attempt two weeks ago to reenter the running world. I had been easing my ankle into things with the elliptical, and wasn't planning on running anywhere just yet.  BUT...the kids wanted to go see the cows in the pasture behind my parent's house.  "What does that have to do with anything?!" an inquiring mind might ask.  I really wish there was a sensical answer to that...but there isn't.

As it turns out, a sufficient level of satisfaction could not be reached by simply LOOKING at the cows.  The totally reasonable, undemanding children wanted to PET the cows.  Unfortunately, cows aren't really creatures that are known for wanting to BE petted...so they all ran away.  Luckily, the totally reasonable, undemanding children had an alternate proposal - if THEY couldn't pet the cows, the next best thing was (obviously) for ME to pet the cow for them.

There was crying and talk of depression over broken cow-petting dreams - so I did what any normal person who happened to have her running kicks on would do - I chased the stupid cows.  One of the cows stopped running (they are HUGE at arms distance, by the way) and we stood there looking at each other.  I thought we were like, bonding through eye contact or something, so I held my hand out... and it snorted at me.  Once my feet landed back on the ground from jumping out of my skin, I took off.  THAT was probably my fastest mile to date.  It's a damn shame I didn't flip my Map My Run app on before I bolted...

Then, I had a stomach bug two weeks in a row and have been all but worthless.  I think I've gotten two good runs in the past two weeks.  And by "good" I mean "I didn't throw up and/or die."

This weekend, I have my first 5K...definitely not something the kid leisurely walking 20 minute miles ever anticipated signing up for.  I'll let you know how that goes.  I do plan on surviving the race - without hitting up the first aid tent.  I did a practice run tonight (3.1 miles) and that didn't totally do me in, so things are looking good.  I had to stop and walk a few times, and I'm pretty sure I shook off a heart attack once or twice....so just the usual.  I got this!

♥M

High on Aspiration, Low on Ability...Part 3

 

Time for an update!  I know you're dying to know how my training is going for the Rugged Maniac.  It probably keeps you up at night, wondering.  If so, then this blog post is just for you!

I have 11 more weeks to go and I can finally run a whole 3 miles without dying.  That was where I set my bar, so anything from this point on is just me being an overachiever.  I've also been lifting weights, etc. in preparation for the obstacle courses, but I'm not going to lie....most of my plan for that particular challenge is just to make it to the top of stuff and then sort of fall over the side.  Or to hold onto my brother-in-law's ankle and let him drag me through the tunnels.  Eh, I have some time still to work on that particular part of the plan.

I have NOT injured myself any further.  I mean, I did cut my pinkie toenail too short before I ran the other day, but I'm recovering nicely, thank you.

 I also gave serious thought while running past the fire department to laying on their doorstep and dramatically flinging my arm against the door until they opened it, then gasping out a plea for a hit off of one of the oxygen tanks.  I didn't act on that fantasy at the time, but I have not discarded it as a bad idea for the future.

I am still miserable on the treadmill.  I have accepted my lack of coordination and make my best efforts to run on ground that stays still.  I actually had to tell someone that I couldn't speak to them last week at the gym, because if I try to talk and run on that devil machine at the same time, I WILL fall off.

 

I got nervous about the Rugged Maniac being my first 5K everrrr....so I signed up for one in April to get the nerves out.  It's called The Race to Parenthood and I'm pretty stoked about the cause and the fact that 100% of my registration went to my sponsored couple's fund.  I plan on ordering this T-shirt to run in...just in case.

 

 

 

 

I bragged that I can "run" 3 miles, but I'm NOT going to tell you how long it takes me.  Let's just say that sometimes I worry about people looking out of their windows in the morning and saying "There goes that weird girl that runs in place on the sidewalk again..."

 

 

To recap:  1) Finishing the 5K = possible because I AM now able to make it that distance and breathe to tell about it.  2) Injury free to date.  3) Not a rock star, but feeling pretty badass.


♥M

For the LOVE of Snow Days...You Made Me Get Real

I kept it light last night with my snow day rant. (For the Love of Snow Days)  Then, we got another snow day. Then, people lost it. Then, I got mad. I tried writing about other stuff tonight, but I've given up and decided to just let the sequel to last night's rant flow.
The level of ignorance people display openly on social media can make us all shake our head from time to time.  The past two weeks, however, I've actually had my jaw drop a few times.  I make a point to never purport knowing how someone else should or shouldn't carry on their professional duties in a job that I have no training or experience in.  As it turns out, though - the world abounds in education experts.  Shocking.

Despite how many people seem to know everything already, I thought I'd attempt to shed some light on things that seem to have caused confusion.

1. The tax payers are NOT being cheated out of my services due to snow.  I won't bore you with the details of my contract, but my work gets done with or without a snow day.  The students are also meeting their required number of HOURS of educational instruction per school year, regardless of a few extra days off. Rest assured, I shall still earn my salary this year despite the weather. IF, however, you are interested in paying me overtime for all of the EXTRA hours I'll work, I'm all ears.

2. I sincerely apologize that you feel slighted by my NOT working, while you ARE.  I get the temptation to declare "No fair!" when you see all the teachers posting about snow cream and drinking coffee in their pajamas as you toil away at whatever it is that you do.  I get it, man. I do. But in case you were wondering what *I* don't think is fair...

          A) School buses being on the road when there's any chance of them wrecking, thus endangering the lives of YOUR children.  In case you've been misled, we do NOT have Hollywood stunt drivers for those things.  We have regular people, like you and me, who are not black-ice proof.

          B) Children being expected to stand in the snow and wait for the bus in 2° temperatures.  We live in the South, people. Some of these kids don't own (and can't afford) anything thicker than fleece. Some of them don't have parents getting them ready in the morning and telling them to wear layers. Don't go all vigilante on me here, I'm just telling you what is.

          C) At the risk of going off topic - this is where I'm going to offer you a suggestion of what you SHOULD be mad about and say "No fair!" to.  How about all of the students being required to perform at the same level academically and achieve success at the same pace, regardless of ability level (or disabilities)?  See - THAT'S not fair. Now, let your indignation be of actual use and go campaign about that.

3. This is my favorite: "If teachers have the gall to hope for a snow day, then they obviously don't want to do their job, and therefore don't care about their students."  Do I really even need to justify this with a rebuttal?  No. Am I going to rip it to shreds anyway? Yes... Any HINT that I don't genuinely love my students makes me see red. I refuse to list all of the things I do and sacrifice for them, because I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO.  I would not have gone to college, taken umpteen expensive tests for my license, maintain said license, and keep showing up every year if I didn't love teaching and my students.  I'm sure as hell not walking into that classroom and fighting the good fight every day for MY benefit.  

******

Well, snow grinches...I hope you're happy.  You pushed my restraint and made me get sassy.  The nerve.

♥M

High on Aspiration, Low on Ability...Part 2


So when we last left off (High on Aspiration, Low on Ability), I had begun "training" for the Rugged Maniac coming up this Spring.  I am proud to say that Week #1 was as close to a smashing success as it gets for me.  I logged a running total of 7.1 miles for the week and only hurt  myself ONCE doing it!  7.1 miles in one week is a total joke to you marathoners, but I'm fairly certain that if you totaled the number of miles I've ever run in my entire life before last week....it probably wouldn't be much more than that.

Then it snowed.  I was tough about the 5:30am crap, the cold weather, and I even got right up and kept running when I fell and scraped my knees, but snow?!  My level of dedication is not, nor will probably ever be, THERE.  So I went to the gym and ran on the treadmill.  It was awful.  Do you know how freakin' coordinated you have to be to run in place while the ground is moving beneath you?!  I almost ate it when I tried to drink some water while still slow-jogging!  Seriously, it gave me nightmares. 

In other words, Week #2 was a whopping misfortune as far as "training" went.  I logged a wee total of 2 miles running and even managed to injure myself again.  I got excited when I fell last week - not because I did it with all the grace of a drunken gazelle, but because I thought "Oh, Thank God! I got the obligatory injury out of the way and it was only as bad as some scrapes!" 

Apparently, I'm striving to make this a weekly tradition, however.  Today, I pulled a muscle in my right shoulder blade....trying to work out my abs.  I really can't give you any explanation that would help you make sense out of that.  I'm still trying to pan out for myself what happened.  That's just what becomes of you when you get fancy and attempt adding stuff to your routine.  Jillian Michaels, I am NOT.

So that's my real inspiration of an update.  I'm still running low on the ability scale, but maintaining a good amount of the aspiration.  Assuming that I don't end up in a body cast, I'll be sure to keep you apprised of my calisthenic catastrophes.  At least I have people who love me and support me enough to send me helpful links like this (I kid you not, my friend text me this and I LOST it):

See how easy it is?  You only have to remember to do TWELVE things at one time while you're running?!  *Sigh*  Regardless, I am determined to train myself to KEEP GOING, even when it's hard.  If I can apply this to every other area in life, then why not apply it to running?

♥M