I'm feeling super proud and domestic tonight for 2 reasons:
1. I baked brownie bites AND cupcakes - on the same night.
2. Neither of them were horrendous disasters.
Don't get excited or be stupid - they were both boxed mixes. I would never be so dumb as to bake from scratch and ruin that many ingredients and waste that much time in one fell swoop. It's not my thing. I accept that and it really doesn't bother me anymore.
I used to be super jealous of my friends and family that could bang out awesome, homemade creations. Now I just appreciate the stuff that they cook...and know my limits. We all have gifts and talents. Usually, they happen to coincide with what you really enjoy doing (not always...but usually). Once it finally dawned on me that I wasn't even really ENJOYING cooking or baking, I got over the fact that I wasn't exactly on my way to winning any competitions. Not that I'm a total quitter - I still cook. Only as necessary, however. You know, like, dinner...or if someone says "Hey, can you bring...?"
Like I said, though - know your limits. We all have them...especially in the kitchen.
My process for evaluating new recipes:
1. How MANY ingredients are involved? (My limit is 5.)
2. Can I pronounce all of the ingredients? (No? Forget it.)
3. Is the prep time longer than 15 minutes? (If so, not going to happen.)
4. Will I spend more on the crap that goes in this, than if I just went to a restaurant? (Yes? Then grab the car keys.)
5. Who is going to be eating it? (People other than the hubs and the kids? Forget it - I don't need this stress in my life. Or the lawsuits after I poison everyone.)
6. How complicated are the directions? (If I have to call someone for clarification, it's best to just move on.)
Rest assured that if you are invited over to my house for a meal, there will be no experimenting in the kitchen. I will either be serving frozen pizza or something that I have made enough times (with positive results), that there is no way I'll screw it up (spaghetti, chili, FROZEN PIZZA...)
Before you think I'm exaggerating, or being too hard on myself, let me share some of my most epic failures with you.
1. One year, for my daughter's Lalaloopsy themed birthday party, I attempted to make pink and yellow swirled sugar cookies. The picture online was super cute. I didn't even MAKE the cookies - I used a mix. Somehow they all ended up purple. And hard. Oh, and I wanted them to look like buttons, so I used a straw to punch holes in them...before I baked them. DUMB. Hard, purple, blobs - THAT'S what went in the favor bags.
2. The next year, I kept it simple. I sent cupcakes to the babysitter's house. I iced the cupcakes too soon, though; so what I actually sent was soggy cupcakes in a sea of icing. Good thing 3 year-olds don't care what their sugar fix LOOKS like.
3. I made deviled eggs for my grandfather's retirement party. I even got fancy and used a piping tool for the filling....which DID NOT MATTER because I put too much mayonnaise in the mixture and it all bled all over the place by the time we got to the party. They tasted great - but no one was brave enough to find that out. (I don't blame them.)
4. I ruined Hamburger Helper. I used spoiled milk and it tasted like sewage. In my defense, I had just bought the milk that day, so that was their foul. In my husband's defense, he ate half of his like a champ, not wanting to hurt my feelings, until I took a bite and screamed, "WHY ARE YOU EATING THIS?!"
5. And the most epic of all? I left a pot of boiling water on the stove and forgot I was cooking. I burnt the pot. I screwed up boiling water. Fail.
So cooking isn't my thing. That's Ok! It actually works out well for me, because now that it's been pretty established by my "A for effort" failures, people know better than to ask. I'm the person who brings chips & dip to parties, canned green beans to Thanksgiving dinner, and store bought desserts to baby showers. Do they sell it at a bakery or deli? Then I got it!
♥M
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